life is soo complicated, there is no black and white, only shades of grey, only little shades that have no right or wrong, that are full of reason's understanding, and acceptance, even when the thing, the reason is crap and bullshit, but it's true... but we still need to accpet it.....

just finished PD 3 for studio.... working hard on it.... why do i feel as though i'm waiting for a bus to hit me, so that at least i would feel something, because latly i've found that i've been unable to feel, to laugh, to smile, at least genually.....

it's true i miss you, in fact i miss you like hell, that fact that i can look at a pencil and think about you is crazy, in fact me writting about you all ta time is crazy, in fact everytime i rember another month has gone past is crazy, in fact... i'm going crazy.

someone once said 'sucess is 99% persperation 1% inspiration', it doesn't matter, how hard i work, how much i miss you, how much i care for you, i worn't succed... cos u worn't come back will you, we worn't be able to talk like we used to, i worn't be able to hear your stupid cold annoying jokes anymore will i? i worn't be able to hear you say ur short sighted will i? i worn't ever get a 2nd hug will i?