after all that yesterday.... i read back... and also banned you from reading this........ but yes..... some parts of wish you would read this... then maybe you would see what i'm feeling... because i'm scared if i tell u u will run away. tomorow is the last day of chinese school and next year we worn't get to see each other that much.... infact we probly worn't have tha chance to see each other at all..... lets make 2morow a good day,,,, so i can at least hold onto somthing.

every since getting up this morning.... it's been a bad feeling.... but when u replied that text this morning... mai dai got a little better, it might seem crazy but..... when i talked to you about mai past.......... i kind of regreated it.... i should have never said any of those things... because i promised mai slef that i would never tell anyone... but i guess i have now..... sometimes it's hard to explain whats good and bad i life... so at the mom i don't know whether this is good or bad.... because i don't know what good and bad anymore.... is it 'bad' to like you? or is it good? is it bad to tell you? or is it good?

i remeber reading in teh chiese newpaper about 'waht a good man and a rich man can give you' i remeber the author worte 'a rich man is someone who would take you out to a 5 star hotel and treat you like a princess, a good man will take you out to a picnic and make you feel like a princess' the last sentencs she worte in that paragraph was 'if you happen to find someone... it's better he be a good mand then a rich one...' i know 3 years ago i would have said i want the rich man, but now i would say, i want the good man. it's funny how someone can make you change like that... no matter how harrd it might seem it is what has happened. i've changed thanxs to you... i guess i want to thank you for at lest that... thank you....